“I met him for 30 minutes before we got married. He was ok.” Her aunt thought they were a good match. She believes she was right.
Over mashed veggies with cilantro and chilled mango juice, we talked about this.
“How would you know that you’ll be happy?”
“I didn’t. But isn’t that a part of the excitement of marriage, to find out? Isn’t it what a marriage should be, to construct the happiness together? If you dated a guy so long, there will be no surprises. You are just living together either as boyfriend or husband.”
I never thought of it this way. My grandma married grandpa before she even saw what he looked like. But here she is, 10 years younger than I am, with bright eyes and silky hair well kept with the secret oil her mother makes.
“Our tradition is strong. It binds us together. I know our family, our daughter is what he will care about for the rest of his life. When I see those people who divorce after marrying their boyfriends, I feel we are happier.”
Quite a few of my classmates are “those people”. I read divorce statistics somewhere. It is higher every year.
“Honestly, tell me what good does it do to know the guy before you marry?”